From Hiding to Healing: Healing Your Queer Inner Child

Growing up queer can leave deep emotional scars. Many LGBTQ+ folks hide their true selves, facing fear, misunderstanding, and rejection. This affects how we interact, our self-esteem, and our ability to be authentic. But within us is an inner child who dreamed of being free. Healing means reconnecting, accepting who we are, and breaking free.

Therapy: A Guiding Light on Your Healing Journey

Therapy isn't just about talking; it's about unlocking doors we've long forgotten, revealing paths to healing we might not have realized were there. It offers a unique space where the inner child can be heard, acknowledged, and soothed—an essential step for anyone who's had to hide who they are. If you're ready to talk to a therapist in California book an intro session through this link to get started!

How Therapy Can Help:

  • Validation: Valuing your feelings and experiences by a compassionate professional can be profoundly healing.
  • Exploration: Therapy provides a safe space to explore the impact of past experiences on your present life.
  • Tools for Healing: Therapists can equip you with coping strategies and tools to address feelings of shame, anxiety, or low self-esteem.
  • Reconnection: Guidance in reconnecting with and nurturing your inner child, helping to heal old wounds and foster self-acceptance.

Tips for Healing Your Inner Child

Healing is as individual as our fingerprints, but there are universal steps we can all take to soothe and nurture our inner child.

Acknowledge Your Inner Child's Existence

  • Listen: Start by acknowledging that your inner child exists. Listen to what they long to say, feel, or do.
  • Write a Letter: Writing letters to your inner child is another form of journaling and expressing feelings. What do they need to hear from you? What apologies, affirmations, or promises can you offer them?

Give What Was Needed

  • Safety and Acceptance: Create a safe emotional space for yourself. Practice self-acceptance daily. You are worthy of love and belonging exactly as you are.
  • Joy and Play: Reconnect with activities or hobbies you loved as a child or have always wanted to try. Allow yourself to experience joy and play without judgment.

Establish Healthy Boundaries

  • Self-Protection: Learn to set and enforce healthy boundaries with others and yourself. It's okay to say no, to take space, and to prioritize your well-being.
  • Safe Relationships: Surround yourself with people who affirm and support your identity. Healthy relationships can significantly contribute to healing.

Navigating Authenticity in Current Relationships

One of the most challenging aspects of healing is deciding how to present yourself in your current relationships. Here are some thoughts to consider:

The Cost of a Persona

  • Wearing a mask can be exhausting. Constantly curating a version of yourself to be accepted by others denies your inner child the validation and love they've always needed.

The Freedom of Authenticity

  • While the fear of rejection is real, living authentically allows you to form deeper, more genuine connections. It's about quality, not quantity, in relationships.

Making the Choice

  • Reflect on Your Needs: What does your inner child need most right now? Protection, visibility, connection, or something else?
  • Assess Your Environment: Is it safe to be fully yourself in your current relationships or surroundings? If not, how can you create or seek out a safer space?
  • Prioritize Your Well-being: Sometimes, choosing authenticity may mean changing or leaving relationships. While difficult, this act of self-preservation can be incredibly empowering.

The Path to Authentic Living

Deciding whether to be accepted for a persona or rejected for being your true self is a profound dilemma. Yet, the journey towards healing and authenticity is not about making a single, monumental choice. It's about countless small decisions made every day:

  • Choosing self-love over self-judgment.
  • Opting for openness where it feels safe to do so.
  • Prioritizing relationships that nurture rather than diminish you.

In every moment of decision, you honor your inner child, affirming their right to exist and flourish.


If you're in the LGBT community and had to hide, your inner child is key to resilience, creativity, and love. Healing isn't easy, but therapy can help you navigate self-acceptance and authenticity. It's not just about the past, but a future where you can be yourself. Schedule a free intro call with a therapist in California to help you on your healing journey!

Let your inner child guide you, and face the world with courage and belief in your worth. Embrace your journey with kindness, patience, and an open heart. You're a bright and shining part of the human experience, adding strength and beauty to everything. Keep shining, inspiring others to shine with you.


Related Blog Posts:

Affirming Online Therapy for the LGBTQIA+ Community

Breaking Stigma: The Power of Therapy in San Diego for Mental Health

How to Create Bad-Ass Boundaries in Unhealthy LGBTQ+ Family Dynamics