Trauma is an invisible wound that many carry. Yet, society often struggles to understand or validate the experiences of trauma survivors. Despite growing awareness, harmful beliefs and stigmatizing statements persist, making it harder for survivors to heal and seek the support they need. These societal attitudes deepen feelings of isolation and perpetuate the cycle of shame and silence.
Let’s check out some typical statements that show the stigma around trauma survivors and why these attitudes are really damaging.
- “Why can’t you just move on?”
- “You’re overreacting.”
- “It wasn’t that bad.”
- “You’re too sensitive.”
- “Stop playing the victim.”
- “You’re making excuses.”
- “Get over it already.”
- “Others have it worse.”
- “You’re so damaged.”
- “Trauma is just an excuse.”
These sayings come from not really understanding how trauma affects people in the long run. Folks who have been through trauma often have really strong emotional and physical reactions when something reminds them of what they went through. When you tell them to “get over it” or that they’re “making a big deal out of it,” you’re not taking their real psychological and physical responses seriously. It’s like you’re saying their trauma isn’t important or worth paying attention to.
Other harmful sentiments, like “you’re too fragile” or “you’re broken,” create an image of trauma survivors as permanently damaged. These perceptions ignore survivors’ resilience and ability to heal when given the proper support. The belief that trauma is a personal failing rather than a response to harmful experiences only adds to the weight survivors carry. It reinforces the myth that those who’ve suffered are somehow less capable or deserving of living a full and happy life.
Statements like “others have it worse” and “that happened so long ago” fuel the idea that there is a timeline or hierarchy to trauma. These beliefs suggest that some people’s pain isn’t significant enough to warrant attention or that there’s an expiration date on someone’s emotional wounds. The truth is that trauma is deeply personal, and everyone’s healing journey is unique.
Such stigmatizing ideas not only prevent survivors from opening up about their experiences but also discourage them from seeking help. Survivors may internalize these beliefs, thinking that they should be over it by now or that asking for help makes them weak or “damaged.” This can lead to even more isolation and further delay the healing process.
So, how do we challenge these stigmas?
First, we need to educate ourselves and those around us. Trauma is a complex, multifaceted experience, and healing takes time. Survivors need empathy, understanding, and validation—not judgment or criticism. By listening without judgment and validating someone’s feelings, we can create a safe space for them to process their pain and begin healing.
It’s also crucial for survivors to know that their experiences are valid and their healing journey is their own. There’s no set timeline for when someone should “get over” their trauma, and there’s no comparison between one person’s pain and another’s.
If you’re struggling with trauma or know someone who is, know that you don’t have to navigate this path alone. As a Queer Trauma Therapist, I provide a safe, supportive space for trauma survivors to explore their feelings, understand their triggers, and begin the healing process. I understand the unique challenges of living with trauma, and I’m here to help.
I’m currently accepting online therapy clients across California. If you’re ready to take the first step in your healing journey, I invite you to book a free intro session with me. Together, we can work toward your emotional well-being, one step at a time.
